I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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