Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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