what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
