just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
