Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
only you would photoshop your dick
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
