You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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