Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.

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  (847): the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker. http://tfl.nu/4drl
  Replies (13) Good night (1732) Bad night (602) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  be more specific...?

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  (248): whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen? (1-248): be more specific...? http://tfl.nu/5e4s
  Replies (6) Good night (1749) Bad night (464) Order T-Shirt
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol

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  (502): I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol http://tfl.nu/lm4w
  Replies (8) Good night (2365) Bad night (696) Order T-Shirt
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.

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  (216): We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me. http://tfl.nu/rmif
  Replies (15) Good night (2499) Bad night (595) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her

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  (716): Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her http://tfl.nu/fzg2
  Replies (5) Good night (698) Bad night (3556) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  We need to start having sex underwater more often.

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  (570): We need to start having sex underwater more often. http://tfl.nu/04ms
  Replies (19) Good night (5758) Bad night (565) Order T-Shirt
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.

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  (740): The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story. http://tfl.nu/x6qv
  Replies (18) Good night (6366) Bad night (719) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.

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  (708): so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me. http://tfl.nu/mwnt
  Replies (58) Good night (14214) Bad night (1152) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.

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  (218): Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there. http://tfl.nu/e7vr
  Replies (8) Good night (1174) Bad night (2189) Order T-Shirt
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.

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  (785): Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage. http://tfl.nu/6qi6
  Replies (17) Good night (1145) Bad night (1703)
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  (805): View more from California

  The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.

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  (805): The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out. http://tfl.nu/nl9o
  Replies (3) Good night (395) Bad night (776) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.

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  (724): Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it. http://tfl.nu/l2a6
  Replies (8) Good night (350) Bad night (866) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...

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  (314): He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on. (636): Sounds like he's doing this for your own good... http://tfl.nu/dn1j
  Replies (3) Good night (1414) Bad night (332)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.

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  (765): That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk. http://tfl.nu/c4df
  Replies (2) Good night (429) Bad night (1429) Order T-Shirt
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  (387): View more from

  The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?

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  (387): The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them? http://tfl.nu/qjyv
  Replies (10) Good night (1302) Bad night (234) Order T-Shirt

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