North Korea, Best Korea!
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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