he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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