so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
