Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
