Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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