these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
party gras won. party gras always wins.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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