Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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