I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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