my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I touched a dick in church today
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