Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
