Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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