There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Blow job season was short but glorious.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Randomize
