ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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