Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize