they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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