i don't like sucking hair
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize