I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
