"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize