We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize