the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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