But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
