I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
