Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
what the fuck happened to the tacos
jump out the window naked night went bad
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
