do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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