i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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