He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
My dick has a subreddit
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
