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• (818): View more from California

  She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?

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• (716): View more from New York

  can you take me to a tanning bed

  (1-716): View more from New York

  sure, why though?

  (716): View more from New York

  i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious

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• (906): View more from Michigan

  The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (602): View more from Arizona

  Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (949): View more from California

  You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  "Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...

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• (305): View more from Florida

  Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.

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