He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Randomize