what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
