Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
being pregnant is like rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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