How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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