kristin has been a bad kristin
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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