Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
being pregnant is like rehab
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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