5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
