i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
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