Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
