Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
