I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
