FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Randomize
