He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
