I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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