i would one night stand the shit outta him
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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