Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
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