Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Randomize
